FOR the most wild, yet most homely narrative which I am about to pen, I
neither expect nor solicit belief. Mad indeed would I be to expect it, in
a case where my very senses reject their own evidence. Yet, mad am I not—and
very surely do I not dream. But to-morrow I die, and to-day I would
unburthen my soul. My immediate purpose is to place before the world,
plainly, succinctly, and without comment, a series of mere household
events. In their consequences, these events have terrified—have
tortured—have destroyed me. Yet I will not attempt to expound them.
To me, they have presented little but Horror—to many they will seem
less terrible than barroques. Hereafter, perhaps, some intellect
may be found which will reduce my phantasm to the common-place—some
intellect more calm, more logical, and far less excitable than my own,
which will perceive, in the circumstances I detail with awe, nothing more
than an ordinary succession of very natural causes and effects.
From my infancy I was noted for the docility and humanity of my
disposition. My tenderness of heart was even so conspicuous as to make me
the jest of my companions. I was especially fond of animals, and was
indulged by my parents with a great variety of pets. With these I spent
most of my time, and never was so happy as when feeding and caressing
them. This peculiarity of character grew with my growth, and in my
manhood, I derived from it one of my principal sources of pleasure. To
those who have cherished an affection for a faithful and sagacious dog, I
need hardly be at the trouble of explaining the nature or the intensity of
the gratification thus derivable. There is something in the unselfish and
self-sacrificing love of a brute, which goes directly to the heart of him
who has had frequent occasion to test the paltry friendship and gossamer
fidelity of mere Man.
I married early, and was happy to find in my wife a disposition not
uncongenial with my own. Observing my partiality for domestic pets, she
lost no opportunity of procuring those of the most agreeable kind. We had
birds, gold-fish, a fine dog, rabbits, a small monkey, and a cat.
This latter was a remarkably large and beautiful animal, entirely black,
and sagacious to an astonishing degree. In speaking of his intelligence,
my wife, who at heart was not a little tinctured with superstition, made
frequent allusion to the ancient popular notion, which regarded all black
cats as witches in disguise. Not that she was ever serious upon
this point—and I mention the matter at all for no better reason than
that it happens, just now, to be remembered.
Pluto—this was the cat's name—was my favorite pet and
playmate. I alone fed him, and he attended me wherever I went about the
house. It was even with difficulty that I could prevent him from following
me through the streets.
Our friendship lasted, in this manner, for several years, during which my
general temperament and character—through the instrumentality of the
Fiend Intemperance—had (I blush to confess it) experienced a radical
alteration for the worse. I grew, day by day, more moody, more irritable,
more regardless of the feelings of others. I suffered myself to use
intemperate language to my wife. At length, I even offered her personal
violence. My pets, of course, were made to feel the change in my
disposition. I not only neglected, but ill-used them. For Pluto, however,
I still retained sufficient regard to restrain me from maltreating him, as
I made no scruple of maltreating the rabbits, the monkey, or even the dog,
when by accident, or through affection, they came in my way. But my
disease grew upon me—for what disease is like Alcohol!—and at
length even Pluto, who was now becoming old, and consequently somewhat
peevish—even Pluto began to experience the effects of my ill temper.
One night, returning home, much intoxicated, from one of my haunts about
town, I fancied that the cat avoided my presence. I seized him; when, in
his fright at my violence, he inflicted a slight wound upon my hand with
his teeth. The fury of a demon instantly possessed me. I knew myself no
longer. My original soul seemed, at once, to take its flight from my body
and a more than fiendish malevolence, gin-nurtured, thrilled every fibre
of my frame. I took from my waistcoat-pocket a pen-knife, opened it,
grasped the poor beast by the throat, and deliberately cut one of its eyes
from the socket! I blush, I burn, I shudder, while I pen the damnable
atrocity.
When reason returned with the morning—when I had slept off the fumes
of the night's debauch—I experienced a sentiment half of horror,
half of remorse, for the crime of which I had been guilty; but it was, at
best, a feeble and equivocal feeling, and the soul remained untouched. I
again plunged into excess, and soon drowned in wine all memory of the
deed.
In the meantime the cat slowly recovered. The socket of the lost eye
presented, it is true, a frightful appearance, but he no longer appeared
to suffer any pain. He went about the house as usual, but, as might be
expected, fled in extreme terror at my approach. I had so much of my old
heart left, as to be at first grieved by this evident dislike on the part
of a creature which had once so loved me. But this feeling soon gave place
to irritation. And then came, as if to my final and irrevocable overthrow,
the spirit of PERVERSENESS. Of this spirit philosophy takes no account.
Yet I am not more sure that my soul lives, than I am that perverseness is
one of the primitive impulses of the human heart—one of the
indivisible primary faculties, or sentiments, which give direction to the
character of Man. Who has not, a hundred times, found himself committing a
vile or a silly action, for no other reason than because he knows he
should not? Have we not a perpetual inclination, in the teeth of our best
judgment, to violate that which is Law, merely because we
understand it to be such? This spirit of perverseness, I say, came to my
final overthrow. It was this unfathomable longing of the soul to vex
itself—to offer violence to its own nature—to do wrong for
the wrong's sake only—that urged me to continue and finally to
consummate the injury I had inflicted upon the unoffending brute. One
morning, in cool blood, I slipped a noose about its neck and hung it to
the limb of a tree;—hung it with the tears streaming from my eyes,
and with the bitterest remorse at my heart;—hung it because I
knew that it had loved me, and because I felt it had given me no
reason of offence;—hung it because I knew that in so doing I
was committing a sin—a deadly sin that would so jeopardize my
immortal soul as to place it—if such a thing wore possible—even
beyond the reach of the infinite mercy of the Most Merciful and Most
Terrible God.
On the night of the day on which this cruel deed was done, I was aroused
from sleep by the cry of fire. The curtains of my bed were in flames. The
whole house was blazing. It was with great difficulty that my wife, a
servant, and myself, made our escape from the conflagration. The
destruction was complete. My entire worldly wealth was swallowed up, and I
resigned myself thenceforward to despair.
I am above the weakness of seeking to establish a sequence of cause and
effect, between the disaster and the atrocity. But I am detailing a chain
of facts—and wish not to leave even a possible link imperfect. On
the day succeeding the fire, I visited the ruins. The walls, with one
exception, had fallen in. This exception was found in a compartment wall,
not very thick, which stood about the middle of the house, and against
which had rested the head of my bed. The plastering had here, in great
measure, resisted the action of the fire—a fact which I attributed
to its having been recently spread. About this wall a dense crowd were
collected, and many persons seemed to be examining a particular portion of
it with very minute and eager attention. The words "strange!" "singular!"
and other similar expressions, excited my curiosity. I approached and saw,
as if graven in bas relief upon the white surface, the figure of a
gigantic cat. The impression was given with an accuracy truly
marvellous. There was a rope about the animal's neck.
When I first beheld this apparition—for I could scarcely regard it
as less—my wonder and my terror were extreme. But at length
reflection came to my aid. The cat, I remembered, had been hung in a
garden adjacent to the house. Upon the alarm of fire, this garden had been
immediately filled by the crowd—by some one of whom the animal must
have been cut from the tree and thrown, through an open window, into my
chamber. This had probably been done with the view of arousing me from
sleep. The falling of other walls had compressed the victim of my cruelty
into the substance of the freshly-spread plaster; the lime of which, with
the flames, and the ammonia from the carcass, had then accomplished
the portraiture as I saw it.
Although I thus readily accounted to my reason, if not altogether to my
conscience, for the startling fact just detailed, it did not the less fail
to make a deep impression upon my fancy. For months I could not rid myself
of the phantasm of the cat; and, during this period, there came back into
my spirit a half-sentiment that seemed, but was not, remorse. I went so
far as to regret the loss of the animal, and to look about me, among the
vile haunts which I now habitually frequented, for another pet of the same
species, and of somewhat similar appearance, with which to supply its
place.
One night as I sat, half stupified, in a den of more than infamy, my
attention was suddenly drawn to some black object, reposing upon the head
of one of the immense hogsheads of Gin, or of Rum, which constituted the
chief furniture of the apartment. I had been looking steadily at the top
of this hogshead for some minutes, and what now caused me surprise was the
fact that I had not sooner perceived the object thereupon. I approached
it, and touched it with my hand. It was a black cat—a very large one—fully
as large as Pluto, and closely resembling him in every respect but one.
Pluto had not a white hair upon any portion of his body; but this cat had
a large, although indefinite splotch of white, covering nearly the whole
region of the breast. Upon my touching him, he immediately arose, purred
loudly, rubbed against my hand, and appeared delighted with my notice.
This, then, was the very creature of which I was in search. I at once
offered to purchase it of the landlord; but this person made no claim to
it—knew nothing of it—had never seen it before.
I continued my caresses, and, when I prepared to go home, the animal
evinced a disposition to accompany me. I permitted it to do so;
occasionally stooping and patting it as I proceeded. When it reached the
house it domesticated itself at once, and became immediately a great
favorite with my wife.
For my own part, I soon found a dislike to it arising within me. This was
just the reverse of what I had anticipated; but—I know not how or
why it was—its evident fondness for myself rather disgusted and
annoyed. By slow degrees, these feelings of disgust and annoyance rose
into the bitterness of hatred. I avoided the creature; a certain sense of
shame, and the remembrance of my former deed of cruelty, preventing me
from physically abusing it. I did not, for some weeks, strike, or
otherwise violently ill use it; but gradually—very gradually—I
came to look upon it with unutterable loathing, and to flee silently from
its odious presence, as from the breath of a pestilence.
What added, no doubt, to my hatred of the beast, was the discovery, on the
morning after I brought it home, that, like Pluto, it also had been
deprived of one of its eyes. This circumstance, however, only endeared it
to my wife, who, as I have already said, possessed, in a high degree, that
humanity of feeling which had once been my distinguishing trait, and the
source of many of my simplest and purest pleasures.
With my aversion to this cat, however, its partiality for myself seemed to
increase. It followed my footsteps with a pertinacity which it would be
difficult to make the reader comprehend. Whenever I sat, it would crouch
beneath my chair, or spring upon my knees, covering me with its loathsome
caresses. If I arose to walk it would get between my feet and thus nearly
throw me down, or, fastening its long and sharp claws in my dress,
clamber, in this manner, to my breast. At such times, although I longed to
destroy it with a blow, I was yet withheld from so doing, partly by a
memory of my former crime, but chiefly—let me confess it at once—by
absolute dread of the beast.
This dread was not exactly a dread of physical evil—and yet I should
be at a loss how otherwise to define it. I am almost ashamed to own—yes,
even in this felon's cell, I am almost ashamed to own—that the
terror and horror with which the animal inspired me, had been heightened
by one of the merest chimaeras it would be possible to conceive. My wife
had called my attention, more than once, to the character of the mark of
white hair, of which I have spoken, and which constituted the sole visible
difference between the strange beast and the one I had destroyed. The
reader will remember that this mark, although large, had been originally
very indefinite; but, by slow degrees—degrees nearly imperceptible,
and which for a long time my Reason struggled to reject as fanciful—it
had, at length, assumed a rigorous distinctness of outline. It was now the
representation of an object that I shudder to name—and for this,
above all, I loathed, and dreaded, and would have rid myself of the
monster had I dared—it was now, I say, the image of a hideous—of
a ghastly thing—of the GALLOWS!—oh, mournful and terrible
engine of Horror and of Crime—of Agony and of Death!
And now was I indeed wretched beyond the wretchedness of mere Humanity.
And a brute beast —whose fellow I had contemptuously
destroyed—a brute beast to work out for me—for
me a man, fashioned in the image of the High God—so much of
insufferable wo! Alas! neither by day nor by night knew I the blessing of
Rest any more! During the former the creature left me no moment alone;
and, in the latter, I started, hourly, from dreams of unutterable fear, to
find the hot breath of the thing upon my face, and its vast weight—an
incarnate Night-Mare that I had no power to shake off—incumbent
eternally upon my heart!
Beneath the pressure of torments such as these, the feeble remnant of the
good within me succumbed. Evil thoughts became my sole intimates—the
darkest and most evil of thoughts. The moodiness of my usual temper
increased to hatred of all things and of all mankind; while, from the
sudden, frequent, and ungovernable outbursts of a fury to which I now
blindly abandoned myself, my uncomplaining wife, alas! was the most usual
and the most patient of sufferers.
One day she accompanied me, upon some household errand, into the cellar of
the old building which our poverty compelled us to inhabit. The cat
followed me down the steep stairs, and, nearly throwing me headlong,
exasperated me to madness. Uplifting an axe, and forgetting, in my wrath,
the childish dread which had hitherto stayed my hand, I aimed a blow at
the animal which, of course, would have proved instantly fatal had it
descended as I wished. But this blow was arrested by the hand of my wife.
Goaded, by the interference, into a rage more than demoniacal, I withdrew
my arm from her grasp and buried the axe in her brain. She fell dead upon
the spot, without a groan.
This hideous murder accomplished, I set myself forthwith, and with entire
deliberation, to the task of concealing the body. I knew that I could not
remove it from the house, either by day or by night, without the risk of
being observed by the neighbors. Many projects entered my mind. At one
period I thought of cutting the corpse into minute fragments, and
destroying them by fire. At another, I resolved to dig a grave for it in
the floor of the cellar. Again, I deliberated about casting it in the well
in the yard—about packing it in a box, as if merchandize, with the
usual arrangements, and so getting a porter to take it from the house.
Finally I hit upon what I considered a far better expedient than either of
these. I determined to wall it up in the cellar—as the monks of the
middle ages are recorded to have walled up their victims.
For a purpose such as this the cellar was well adapted. Its walls were
loosely constructed, and had lately been plastered throughout with a rough
plaster, which the dampness of the atmosphere had prevented from
hardening. Moreover, in one of the walls was a projection, caused by a
false chimney, or fireplace, that had been filled up, and made to resemble
the red of the cellar. I made no doubt that I could readily displace the
bricks at this point, insert the corpse, and wall the whole up as before,
so that no eye could detect any thing suspicious. And in this calculation
I was not deceived. By means of a crow-bar I easily dislodged the bricks,
and, having carefully deposited the body against the inner wall, I propped
it in that position, while, with little trouble, I re-laid the whole
structure as it originally stood. Having procured mortar, sand, and hair,
with every possible precaution, I prepared a plaster which could not be
distinguished from the old, and with this I very carefully went over the
new brickwork. When I had finished, I felt satisfied that all was right.
The wall did not present the slightest appearance of having been
disturbed. The rubbish on the floor was picked up with the minutest care.
I looked around triumphantly, and said to myself—"Here at least,
then, my labor has not been in vain."
My next step was to look for the beast which had been the cause of so much
wretchedness; for I had, at length, firmly resolved to put it to death.
Had I been able to meet with it, at the moment, there could have been no
doubt of its fate; but it appeared that the crafty animal had been alarmed
at the violence of my previous anger, and forebore to present itself in my
present mood. It is impossible to describe, or to imagine, the deep, the
blissful sense of relief which the absence of the detested creature
occasioned in my bosom. It did not make its appearance during the night—and
thus for one night at least, since its introduction into the house, I
soundly and tranquilly slept; aye, slept even with the burden of murder
upon my soul!
The second and the third day passed, and still my tormentor came not. Once
again I breathed as a freeman. The monster, in terror, had fled the
premises forever! I should behold it no more! My happiness was supreme!
The guilt of my dark deed disturbed me but little. Some few inquiries had
been made, but these had been readily answered. Even a search had been
instituted—but of course nothing was to be discovered. I looked upon
my future felicity as secured.
Upon the fourth day of the assassination, a party of the police came, very
unexpectedly, into the house, and proceeded again to make rigorous
investigation of the premises. Secure, however, in the inscrutability of
my place of concealment, I felt no embarrassment whatever. The officers
bade me accompany them in their search. They left no nook or corner
unexplored. At length, for the third or fourth time, they descended into
the cellar. I quivered not in a muscle. My heart beat calmly as that of
one who slumbers in innocence. I walked the cellar from end to end. I
folded my arms upon my bosom, and roamed easily to and fro. The police
were thoroughly satisfied and prepared to depart. The glee at my heart was
too strong to be restrained. I burned to say if but one word, by way of
triumph, and to render doubly sure their assurance of my guiltlessness.
"Gentlemen," I said at last, as the party ascended the steps, "I delight
to have allayed your suspicions. I wish you all health, and a little more
courtesy. By the bye, gentlemen, this—this is a very well
constructed house." [In the rabid desire to say something easily, I
scarcely knew what I uttered at all.]—"I may say an excellently
well constructed house. These walls—are you going, gentlemen?—these
walls are solidly put together;" and here, through the mere phrenzy of
bravado, I rapped heavily, with a cane which I held in my hand, upon that
very portion of the brick-work behind which stood the corpse of the wife
of my bosom.
But may God shield and deliver me from the fangs of the Arch-Fiend! No
sooner had the reverberation of my blows sunk into silence, than I was
answered by a voice from within the tomb!—by a cry, at first muffled
and broken, like the sobbing of a child, and then quickly swelling into
one long, loud, and continuous scream, utterly anomalous and inhuman—a
howl—a wailing shriek, half of horror and half of triumph, such as
might have arisen only out of hell, conjointly from the throats of the
dammed in their agony and of the demons that exult in the damnation.
Of my own thoughts it is folly to speak. Swooning, I staggered to the
opposite wall. For one instant the party upon the stairs remained
motionless, through extremity of terror and of awe. In the next, a dozen
stout arms were toiling at the wall. It fell bodily. The corpse, already
greatly decayed and clotted with gore, stood erect before the eyes of the
spectators. Upon its head, with red extended mouth and solitary eye of
fire, sat the hideous beast whose craft had seduced me into murder, and
whose informing voice had consigned me to the hangman. I had walled the
monster up within the tomb!
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